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A visit to a sculpture gallery
By Robyn Jones
is a very fine line between art and pornography when it comes to the depiction of the nude human body. However, I am not going to get myself embroiled in an erudite discussion of the subject here, particularly as I do not consider myself in any way to be an expert on the subject. I do, however, enjoy looking at paintings and sculptures of the human nude. I particularly like nude sculptures because they can be appreciated and explored with both the eye and with the hand! Unfortunately this is not something that is normally encouraged in art galleries and one can feel very inhibited in doing so in the presence of strangers. Having said that, I have occasionally plucked up the courage to do so when admiring a particularly fine piece of sculpture. After all, who could resist the opportunity to caress a beautiful set of carved buttocks or even give them a few playful smacks! Smacking cold polished marble is not quite the same as smacking warm, soft flesh, but it can still be fun!
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‘Cold marble and warm flesh’:
Photographs by Nikolai Endegor,
from a series of photos entitled ‘Live Marble’
‘Three Graces’, a Roman copy of a Hellenistic original, 200 AD
The Nymph Echo by Paul Lemoyne (1821)
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There is a particularly fine sculpture gallery in Chatsworth, Derbyshire. It was built to house an extensive collection of sculptures by William Cavendish, the 6th Duke of Devonshire in 1823. It houses an amazing selection of marble sculptures, including some masterpieces by sculptors such as Antonio Canova. However, the one I was particularly drawn to when I visited Chatsworth was one by Lorenzo Bartolini entitled ‘Recumbent Bacchante’, a bacchante being a female follower of Bacchus – the Greco-Roman god of wine, freedom, intoxication and ecstasy.
Anyway, enough of the history! Back to my visit. I was casually wandering around the exhibition when I stumbled on this lovely sculpture shown above. I strolled slowly around her several times, my palm itching to trace the shape of those beautifully full, plump rounded cheeks and deliver a few slaps. I wondered whether anyone might object. As I stood there mesmerised by her lovely rotundities, a lady steward approached me saying,“She is rather beautiful isn’t she?”
I smiled, “Oh yes! She’s got a beautiful figure and certainly has a bottom to die for!”
The steward agreed, “She certainly has!”
Plucking up courage, I continued, “I bet you see many visitors surreptitiously caressing her bottom.”
She giggled, “Oh yes! In fact, I’ve seen a fair number not only caressing her cheeks, but also smacking them as well! In fact, I’ve done so myself a few times when the gallery has been empty. Such a bottom invites that sort of attention, don’t you think?”
Losing any inhibitions I might have had, I responded, “Oh yes, it certainly does!”
She looked around the gallery and then mischievously said, “Go on, feel her and give her a few smacks. There aren’t any visitors in the gallery at the moment and I won’t stop you!”
Needless to say, I didn’t need any further encouragement. I reached out with my right hand and ran them gently along her hip and round the curve of her raised left buttock, before circling back up with my fingers trailing in the deep cleft between her cheeks. It felt good! I then delivered two sharp slaps to her bottom, the sound echoing loudly in the large gallery space. The statue may not have noticed my attentions, but my hand certainly did! Smacking hard, unforgiving stone with your palm hurts!
The lady giggled and asked, “It’s very easy to forget that what you’re smacking is hard stone! Such is the artistry of Bartolini’s work, you think it’s real flesh until your hand makes contact with her bottom!”
I laughed my agreement, rubbing my hand and then thanked her for indulging my perverse urges. She walked off, leaving me to continue my inspection of some of the other delightful statues to see if there were any other spankable bottoms on show. I was not to be disappointed!
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Here is a cleverly created digital painting by Danilo: it depicts the statue of Venus Callipyge having her bottom caned by a naked man. Venus Callipyge is also known as the Aphrodite Kallipygos or the Callipygian Venus, all literally meaning ‘Venus (or Aphrodite) of the beautiful buttocks’
